How do you feel when you are under stress? How do you deal with stress on a daily basis? Do you come home from work everyday and plop down on the sofa crack open a cold one and watch television? Or do you read, go for a walk, work in the garden? Many people do not know about the 3 skills for managing stress; Awareness, Acceptance, and Coping.
Awareness of what causes stress in your life. What are the signals?
Identify what causes you stress
We usually think of stressors as events that make us angry or upset but they also can be situations that make us sad, frightened, unsure, startled, excited, or happy.
We may cause our own stress through our own thoughts, feelings, and expectations.
Recognizing your feelings and emotions when under stress can give a signal that you are under stress.
Physical symptoms; tight muscles, pounding heart beat, chest pain, headaches, upset stomach, fatigue, and others are some signals your body is telling you it is experiencing stress.
Emotional symptoms; depression, anger, irritability, low self-esteem, apathy, negativity, impatience. These are emotional signals that tell a person that they are experiencing too much stress.
Behavioral symptoms; overeating, more drinking, road rage, inattention, forgetfulness, smoking, etc.
Acceptance of what you can do about it. Keep situations in perspective.
Ask yourself is the situation is something you can control? For example; can you control the weather? Or, I am chronically late to work can I control this? What is the solution?
How important is it? Is it really worth getting stressed out about or do I have a solution to the problem.
Use self talk and ask has this happen before? What did I learn from the experience? What else can I do? Is this event likely to change the course of history?
Keep a positive attitude and try to accept the fact that the reality of life is that things don’t always work the way we want or expect.
Coping with the things in your life that cause stress. Do you relax? Have fun? How do you take care of yourself?
Exercise is the best way to handle whatever stress comes your way. A physically fit body is better able to withstand the effects of stress and has a calming effect that lasts long after the exercise is over.
Many people believe that ways we “relax” are drinking, smoking, watching TV, eating, doing nothing work. In fact this does the opposite for example drinking causes a depressed mood and smoking produces a stress response by narrowing blood vessels and releasing chemicals into the blood stream.
Meditation/ breathing exercising are also effective ways in dealing with stress.
Also get back to enjoying life again, when was the last time you did something you enjoyed like golfing, playing in the park with your kids, getting a massage, taking a yoga class, learning to play a musical instrument etc.
Here is a quote from: St. Francis de Sales-
“Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself. Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections, but instantly set about remedying them-everyday begin the task anew.”
If you would like more information on our classes here at Positive Solutions Anger Management and Executive Coaching please visit our website at www.positivesolutions.org or please call Karina Narduzzi at 661-303-5669.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Friday, May 25, 2007
Using Emotional Intelligence to Improve Communication
Emotional Intelligence is the most popular of the four topics taught in the Anderson & Anderson model of anger management. The other three topics are all critically important in increasing one’s emotional intelligence and enhancing interpersonal relationships. These areas are anger management, stress management and assertive communication.
What are the principal methods of communication? Sending and receiving. Speaking, watching, listening, observing activity (of others), i.e. how people react in certain circumstances. Other senses e.g. gut feelings or intuition.
Why is sight the most effective means of communication?It most often gives a common/general interpretation of what is being communicated.
What is meant by behavior clues?
With practice, when you are sending the message, it is possible to pick up clues about how your message is being received and then to modify or rephrase what you are saying, i.e. you get feedback and adjust the communication to make it more acceptable. Emotionally intelligent persons are able to sense the mood, feelings and needs of the speaker and respond accordingly.
What channels of communication should you regularly use and maintain in a business organization?Face to face, telephone (land line and mobile), fax and email, text messaging, marketing DVDs, video conferencing and direct link through computers, company intranet, memos and reports et al. This is changing all the time as IT systems become ever more sophisticated. In my experience, the most effective method by a long way is personal contact. The most difficult or challenging in communicating by e-mail.
What are the most essential skills we need to develop to be effective communicators? It is generally agreed that there are six. These are: Understanding ourselves and others, telling people, asking someone to do something, listening, observing and being convincing in what you say.
Why is telling often an ineffective method of communication? It lacks feedback from the recipient, i.e. how will you know if they understand what is required or whether they are capable of carrying out the task?
Why is asking such an important skill in communicating? When you ask, you obtain the information that our (subconscious) mind needs to help solve your problem.
What sort of attitude should we have towards asking?Ask relevant and pertinent questions that are likely to earn respect. The value in asking largely depends on your ability to listen. This helps to form good relationships and encourages others to be more open in their communications with us.
Why is listening with your hearts such an important skill in effective communication? Listening with your heart implies that you are focusing on more than the words used by the speaker. You are connecting with his or her feelings associated with those words.
What do we mean by observing in a communicational sense?It helps us pick up visual clues from people's reactions to what we are saying to them. We can see how they are responding behaviorally (body language clues) which is valuable feedback. It helps us to refine our senses to interpret how others are responding to our line or style of communication.
Why is it vitally important to be able to understand what is going on when we are communicating to others?Anything we perceive, by any of our senses, is only helpful if we are able to decode the messages that are being picked up by our intuitive mind. This information needs to be understood to be of any use. This is what is meant by understanding, i.e. it occurs when the (conscious) mind correctly interprets the meaning of what is perceived.
In contrast to IQ, EQ or emotional intelligence is a set of skills that any motivated person can learn to improve his or her overall communication skills as well as all other aspects of managing one’s behavior.
George Anderson, BCD, CAMF
George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMFDiplomate, American Association of Anger Management Providershttp://www.andersonservices.com/http://www.angertrends.blogspot.com/www.anger-management-resources.org
What are the principal methods of communication? Sending and receiving. Speaking, watching, listening, observing activity (of others), i.e. how people react in certain circumstances. Other senses e.g. gut feelings or intuition.
Why is sight the most effective means of communication?It most often gives a common/general interpretation of what is being communicated.
What is meant by behavior clues?
With practice, when you are sending the message, it is possible to pick up clues about how your message is being received and then to modify or rephrase what you are saying, i.e. you get feedback and adjust the communication to make it more acceptable. Emotionally intelligent persons are able to sense the mood, feelings and needs of the speaker and respond accordingly.
What channels of communication should you regularly use and maintain in a business organization?Face to face, telephone (land line and mobile), fax and email, text messaging, marketing DVDs, video conferencing and direct link through computers, company intranet, memos and reports et al. This is changing all the time as IT systems become ever more sophisticated. In my experience, the most effective method by a long way is personal contact. The most difficult or challenging in communicating by e-mail.
What are the most essential skills we need to develop to be effective communicators? It is generally agreed that there are six. These are: Understanding ourselves and others, telling people, asking someone to do something, listening, observing and being convincing in what you say.
Why is telling often an ineffective method of communication? It lacks feedback from the recipient, i.e. how will you know if they understand what is required or whether they are capable of carrying out the task?
Why is asking such an important skill in communicating? When you ask, you obtain the information that our (subconscious) mind needs to help solve your problem.
What sort of attitude should we have towards asking?Ask relevant and pertinent questions that are likely to earn respect. The value in asking largely depends on your ability to listen. This helps to form good relationships and encourages others to be more open in their communications with us.
Why is listening with your hearts such an important skill in effective communication? Listening with your heart implies that you are focusing on more than the words used by the speaker. You are connecting with his or her feelings associated with those words.
What do we mean by observing in a communicational sense?It helps us pick up visual clues from people's reactions to what we are saying to them. We can see how they are responding behaviorally (body language clues) which is valuable feedback. It helps us to refine our senses to interpret how others are responding to our line or style of communication.
Why is it vitally important to be able to understand what is going on when we are communicating to others?Anything we perceive, by any of our senses, is only helpful if we are able to decode the messages that are being picked up by our intuitive mind. This information needs to be understood to be of any use. This is what is meant by understanding, i.e. it occurs when the (conscious) mind correctly interprets the meaning of what is perceived.
In contrast to IQ, EQ or emotional intelligence is a set of skills that any motivated person can learn to improve his or her overall communication skills as well as all other aspects of managing one’s behavior.
George Anderson, BCD, CAMF
George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMFDiplomate, American Association of Anger Management Providershttp://www.andersonservices.com/http://www.angertrends.blogspot.com/www.anger-management-resources.org
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Accelerated Anger Management Classes
Positive Solutions Anger Management and Executive Coaching Presents……………………
This 4-hour class is designed to meet the needs of clients who have a hectic lifestyle and cannot attend classes on a weekly basis. Accelerated Anger Management Classes are designed to help busy people meet their goals in less time. It is now possible to enroll, complete the assessment, and attend this course until the required number of classes has been completed.
Date: Saturday June 23, 2007 (more dates to follow)
Cost: Enrollment /Assessment Fee/Workbook $90.00
Class: 4 hours $160.00
Group size: Space is limited to 6
For More information, contact us:
Phone# (661) 303-5669
E-mail: info@positivesolutions.org
Website: www.positivesolutions.org
Best Regards,
Karina Narduzzi B.A., C.A.M.F.
Positive Solutions Anger Management and Executive Coaching
This 4-hour class is designed to meet the needs of clients who have a hectic lifestyle and cannot attend classes on a weekly basis. Accelerated Anger Management Classes are designed to help busy people meet their goals in less time. It is now possible to enroll, complete the assessment, and attend this course until the required number of classes has been completed.
Date: Saturday June 23, 2007 (more dates to follow)
Cost: Enrollment /Assessment Fee/Workbook $90.00
Class: 4 hours $160.00
Group size: Space is limited to 6
For More information, contact us:
Phone# (661) 303-5669
E-mail: info@positivesolutions.org
Website: www.positivesolutions.org
Best Regards,
Karina Narduzzi B.A., C.A.M.F.
Positive Solutions Anger Management and Executive Coaching
Monday, May 21, 2007
Positive Solutions Now a Member of American Association of Anger Management Providers
Positive Solutions Anger Management and Executive Coaching would like to announce that Karina Narduzzi is now a member of the American Association of Anger Management Providers. This organization is made up of professionals in that specialize in the area of Anger Management and seek to continue to uphold the standards in this industry. For more information please visit The American Association of Anger Management Providers at www.aaamp.org
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Jesus and the Jerks
by Jon Walker
“But God demonstrates his own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8 NIV)
Jerk: A person regarded as disagreeable, contemptible, especially as the result of foolish or mean behavior.
One of the biggest jerks I ever knew was a 23-year-old college graduate whose anger and arrogance spilled into many of his relationships. His hypocrisy was astounding – one moment he claimed to be a Christian and the next he acted like a son of hell. If it had been my choice, I would have avoided him all together – but since that jerk was me, I was stuck being around him!
Most of us try to avoid jerks. We pat ourselves on the back for not telling them off. We applaud ourselves for putting up with them. We remind ourselves everybody has a cross to bear, and so we grudgingly accept certain jerks as our divinely ordained burden.
But is that what we’re called to do?
Jesus embraced jerks; he graced them with love – while stilling telling them the truth in love. Now he had no qualms about pointing out a whitewashed tomb when he saw one, but the corporate evil of the Pharisees was a far more serious matter than mere human jerkiness.
The point is this: Jesus didn’t shelter himself from the pain and heartache caused by jerks. In fact, he voluntarily stretched out his arms on the cross and allowed several jerks to slam nails into his hands and feet.
Behind all their stomp and snort, jerks are still spiritual beings, created in God's image and destined for heaven or hell. We’re compelled to be ministers of reconciliation, willing to embrace the pain of a fallen world for the sake of our God. (2 Corinthians 5:16-21)
The heart of the gospel is that God loves the unlovely. Could it be that the jerks God places in our lives are there to teach us to be more like Christ, to teach us the God-like quality of loving the unlovely?
Most of us take for granted the incredible change God initiated in our own lives: We were once jerks to God, yet even while we were still jerks, Christ died for us!
Jerks are never easy to embrace. If it were easy to love everyone, then Christ need not have died; we could love them on our own. But in order to embrace the jerks in our life, we need the Life of Christ within us so that, as new creations, we can overwhelm jerks with God’s grace, showing them the only power that will stop them from stumbling in the darkness, teaching them to cling to the only thing able to move them from being jerks to being Jesus-followers.
So what?
· Jesus loves jerks too – Even the most difficult people are spiritual beings in need of Christ.
· Jesus transforms you – Jesus can use the “jerks” in your life to transform you into a more Christ-like believer. Is it possible that the “jerk” who annoys you is God’s instrument to show you areas where you should grow, areas where you have difficulty loving unconditionally, the way that Christ loves you?
· God’s plan for you – If God allows a difficult person in your life, consider that he may want you to (1) pray for them and (2) show them by your own example how much God loves them, regardless of their behavior.
· Your mission – Who in your life seems disagreeable, contemptible, foolish, or mean? How would God have you approach them from now on? What can you do today to show them the love of Christ?© 2007 Jon Walker
“But God demonstrates his own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8 NIV)
Jerk: A person regarded as disagreeable, contemptible, especially as the result of foolish or mean behavior.
One of the biggest jerks I ever knew was a 23-year-old college graduate whose anger and arrogance spilled into many of his relationships. His hypocrisy was astounding – one moment he claimed to be a Christian and the next he acted like a son of hell. If it had been my choice, I would have avoided him all together – but since that jerk was me, I was stuck being around him!
Most of us try to avoid jerks. We pat ourselves on the back for not telling them off. We applaud ourselves for putting up with them. We remind ourselves everybody has a cross to bear, and so we grudgingly accept certain jerks as our divinely ordained burden.
But is that what we’re called to do?
Jesus embraced jerks; he graced them with love – while stilling telling them the truth in love. Now he had no qualms about pointing out a whitewashed tomb when he saw one, but the corporate evil of the Pharisees was a far more serious matter than mere human jerkiness.
The point is this: Jesus didn’t shelter himself from the pain and heartache caused by jerks. In fact, he voluntarily stretched out his arms on the cross and allowed several jerks to slam nails into his hands and feet.
Behind all their stomp and snort, jerks are still spiritual beings, created in God's image and destined for heaven or hell. We’re compelled to be ministers of reconciliation, willing to embrace the pain of a fallen world for the sake of our God. (2 Corinthians 5:16-21)
The heart of the gospel is that God loves the unlovely. Could it be that the jerks God places in our lives are there to teach us to be more like Christ, to teach us the God-like quality of loving the unlovely?
Most of us take for granted the incredible change God initiated in our own lives: We were once jerks to God, yet even while we were still jerks, Christ died for us!
Jerks are never easy to embrace. If it were easy to love everyone, then Christ need not have died; we could love them on our own. But in order to embrace the jerks in our life, we need the Life of Christ within us so that, as new creations, we can overwhelm jerks with God’s grace, showing them the only power that will stop them from stumbling in the darkness, teaching them to cling to the only thing able to move them from being jerks to being Jesus-followers.
So what?
· Jesus loves jerks too – Even the most difficult people are spiritual beings in need of Christ.
· Jesus transforms you – Jesus can use the “jerks” in your life to transform you into a more Christ-like believer. Is it possible that the “jerk” who annoys you is God’s instrument to show you areas where you should grow, areas where you have difficulty loving unconditionally, the way that Christ loves you?
· God’s plan for you – If God allows a difficult person in your life, consider that he may want you to (1) pray for them and (2) show them by your own example how much God loves them, regardless of their behavior.
· Your mission – Who in your life seems disagreeable, contemptible, foolish, or mean? How would God have you approach them from now on? What can you do today to show them the love of Christ?© 2007 Jon Walker
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Managing Stress and Trauma: Facts and Resources for Veterans and Families
Julian Ford, Ph.D., Executive Division, White River Junction
Symptoms of Posttraumatic Stress
Have you ever:
felt so tense, discouraged, or angry that you were afraid you just couldn't cope?
had an extremely stressful experience that you try not to think about, but it still continues to bother you or is repeated in nightmares?
felt constantly on guard or watchful, or been on edge or jumpy more than you really need to be?
had a family member who seemed troubled in these ways?
If so, this information is for you.
Everyone Experiences Stress
Stress is a normal response of the body and mind. Everyone feels stress when gearing up to deal with major life events (such as marriage, divorce, births, deaths, or starting or ending a job) or handling everyday hassles like arguments, financial headaches, deadlines, or traffic jams.
Physical signs of a stress response include:
Rapid heartbeat
Headaches
Stomach aches
Muscle tension
Emotional signs of stress can be both positive:
Excitement
Exhilaration
Joy
and upsetting:
Frustration
Nervousness
Discouragement
Anxiety
Anger
Stress Can Become a Problem
Repeated stress drains and wears down your body and mind. Stress is like starting a car engine or pushing the accelerator pedal to speed up. If you keep revving up the car, you'll burn out the starter and wear out both the brakes and the engine.
Burnout occurs when repeated stress is not balanced by healthy time outs for genuine relaxation. Stress need not be a problem if you manage it by smoothly and calmly entering or leaving life's fast lane.
Managing Stress
Stress Management involves responding to major life events and everyday hassles by relaxing as well as tensing up. Relaxation actually is a part of the normal stress response. When faced with life's challenges, people not only tense up to react rapidly and forcefully, but they also become calm in order to think clearly and act with control.
Techniques for managing stress include:
Body and mental relaxation
Positive thinking
Problem solving
Anger control
Time management
Exercise
Responsible assertiveness
Interpersonal communication
Physical benefits of managing stress include:
Better sleep, energy, strength, and mobility
Reduced tension, pain, blood pressure, heart problems, and infectious illnesses
Emotional benefits of managing stress include:
Increased quality of life and well-being
Reduced anxiety, depression, and irritability
Can stress become unmanageable?
Trauma can cause severe stress, which may become unmanageable despite the best efforts of good stress management. Let's look at why this happens and what you can do about it.
Traumatic events cause severe stress reactions that are particularly hard to manage. Trauma involves a unique kind of physical/emotional shock that escalates the "fight-flight" stress response (feeling angry or scared) into "super-stress" (feeling terrified, stunned, horrified, like your life is passing before your eyes, or so overwhelmed you blank out).
Trauma occurs when a person directly experiences or witnesses:
Unexpected death
Severe physical injury or suffering
Close calls with death or injury
Sexual violation
If you have ever experienced or witnessed war, disaster, a terrible accident, sexual or physical abuse or assault, kidnapping or hostage-taking, or life-threatening illnesses, you know the shock of trauma.
Nothing in life ever seems quite the same again, even if everything works out for the best. Trauma leaves a lasting imprint of terror, horror, and helplessness on the body and the mind. The world no longer seems safe, manageable, or enjoyable. People no longer seem trustworthy or dependable. Self-doubt and guilt eat away at your self-esteem. Faith and spirituality are shaken or lost.
Traumatic stress can be managed, but special steps are necessary.
Steps in Managing Traumatic Stress
Step One
The first step is recognizing the signs of posttraumatic stress. Trauma is so shocking that it causes memories that are impossible to forget or sometimes impossible to recall. Trauma memories often repeatedly come back when you are not trying to think about them. Memories arise as unpleasant thoughts or nightmares. Sometimes you may feel as if you cannot stop reliving the event. The shock of trauma also may create blank spaces in your memory because it is too much for the mind to handle, and so the mind takes a time out.
Traumatic stress reactions are normal responses to abnormal events. Most people experience posttraumatic stress reactions for days or even weeks after a trauma. Usually these reactions become less severe over time, but they may persist and become a problem.
Step Two
The next step is recognizing the ways of coping with traumatic stress that are natural but don't work, because they actually prolong and worsen the normal posttraumatic stress reactions. The ways of coping that do not work include:
Trying to avoid people, places, or thoughts that are reminders
Shutting off feelings or connections to other people that are reminders
Being hyper-vigilant or on guard
Trying to avoid bad memories, trying to shut out feelings or people, or trying to stay always alert may seem reasonable. However, they don't work because trauma controls your life if you run from it.
Step Three
Step three is to get help from one of several special VA services for veterans (and their families) who are coping with traumatic stress reactions or PTSD (Posttraumatic Stress Disorder). Trauma memories cannot be erased, but the stress they cause can become very manageable.
Find out more about PTSD resources for veterans and families by calling directly or discussing the programs with your physician or nurse. Contact your local Vet Center or one of the VA's specialized PTSD treatment programs.
(Positive Solutions Anger Management and Executive Coaching can assist Veterans and their families suffering from the effects of Stress and PTSD. We work with our clients that are currently in Therapy and their therapist. We assist in providing tools for indiviuals in dealing with Anger, Stress, and Communication skills call us today at 661-303-5669. )
Symptoms of Posttraumatic Stress
Have you ever:
felt so tense, discouraged, or angry that you were afraid you just couldn't cope?
had an extremely stressful experience that you try not to think about, but it still continues to bother you or is repeated in nightmares?
felt constantly on guard or watchful, or been on edge or jumpy more than you really need to be?
had a family member who seemed troubled in these ways?
If so, this information is for you.
Everyone Experiences Stress
Stress is a normal response of the body and mind. Everyone feels stress when gearing up to deal with major life events (such as marriage, divorce, births, deaths, or starting or ending a job) or handling everyday hassles like arguments, financial headaches, deadlines, or traffic jams.
Physical signs of a stress response include:
Rapid heartbeat
Headaches
Stomach aches
Muscle tension
Emotional signs of stress can be both positive:
Excitement
Exhilaration
Joy
and upsetting:
Frustration
Nervousness
Discouragement
Anxiety
Anger
Stress Can Become a Problem
Repeated stress drains and wears down your body and mind. Stress is like starting a car engine or pushing the accelerator pedal to speed up. If you keep revving up the car, you'll burn out the starter and wear out both the brakes and the engine.
Burnout occurs when repeated stress is not balanced by healthy time outs for genuine relaxation. Stress need not be a problem if you manage it by smoothly and calmly entering or leaving life's fast lane.
Managing Stress
Stress Management involves responding to major life events and everyday hassles by relaxing as well as tensing up. Relaxation actually is a part of the normal stress response. When faced with life's challenges, people not only tense up to react rapidly and forcefully, but they also become calm in order to think clearly and act with control.
Techniques for managing stress include:
Body and mental relaxation
Positive thinking
Problem solving
Anger control
Time management
Exercise
Responsible assertiveness
Interpersonal communication
Physical benefits of managing stress include:
Better sleep, energy, strength, and mobility
Reduced tension, pain, blood pressure, heart problems, and infectious illnesses
Emotional benefits of managing stress include:
Increased quality of life and well-being
Reduced anxiety, depression, and irritability
Can stress become unmanageable?
Trauma can cause severe stress, which may become unmanageable despite the best efforts of good stress management. Let's look at why this happens and what you can do about it.
Traumatic events cause severe stress reactions that are particularly hard to manage. Trauma involves a unique kind of physical/emotional shock that escalates the "fight-flight" stress response (feeling angry or scared) into "super-stress" (feeling terrified, stunned, horrified, like your life is passing before your eyes, or so overwhelmed you blank out).
Trauma occurs when a person directly experiences or witnesses:
Unexpected death
Severe physical injury or suffering
Close calls with death or injury
Sexual violation
If you have ever experienced or witnessed war, disaster, a terrible accident, sexual or physical abuse or assault, kidnapping or hostage-taking, or life-threatening illnesses, you know the shock of trauma.
Nothing in life ever seems quite the same again, even if everything works out for the best. Trauma leaves a lasting imprint of terror, horror, and helplessness on the body and the mind. The world no longer seems safe, manageable, or enjoyable. People no longer seem trustworthy or dependable. Self-doubt and guilt eat away at your self-esteem. Faith and spirituality are shaken or lost.
Traumatic stress can be managed, but special steps are necessary.
Steps in Managing Traumatic Stress
Step One
The first step is recognizing the signs of posttraumatic stress. Trauma is so shocking that it causes memories that are impossible to forget or sometimes impossible to recall. Trauma memories often repeatedly come back when you are not trying to think about them. Memories arise as unpleasant thoughts or nightmares. Sometimes you may feel as if you cannot stop reliving the event. The shock of trauma also may create blank spaces in your memory because it is too much for the mind to handle, and so the mind takes a time out.
Traumatic stress reactions are normal responses to abnormal events. Most people experience posttraumatic stress reactions for days or even weeks after a trauma. Usually these reactions become less severe over time, but they may persist and become a problem.
Step Two
The next step is recognizing the ways of coping with traumatic stress that are natural but don't work, because they actually prolong and worsen the normal posttraumatic stress reactions. The ways of coping that do not work include:
Trying to avoid people, places, or thoughts that are reminders
Shutting off feelings or connections to other people that are reminders
Being hyper-vigilant or on guard
Trying to avoid bad memories, trying to shut out feelings or people, or trying to stay always alert may seem reasonable. However, they don't work because trauma controls your life if you run from it.
Step Three
Step three is to get help from one of several special VA services for veterans (and their families) who are coping with traumatic stress reactions or PTSD (Posttraumatic Stress Disorder). Trauma memories cannot be erased, but the stress they cause can become very manageable.
Find out more about PTSD resources for veterans and families by calling directly or discussing the programs with your physician or nurse. Contact your local Vet Center or one of the VA's specialized PTSD treatment programs.
(Positive Solutions Anger Management and Executive Coaching can assist Veterans and their families suffering from the effects of Stress and PTSD. We work with our clients that are currently in Therapy and their therapist. We assist in providing tools for indiviuals in dealing with Anger, Stress, and Communication skills call us today at 661-303-5669. )
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Miami holds top spot on rude driver list
By SARAH LARIMER, Associated Press WriterTue May 15, 9:07 AM ET
For the second straight year, rude Miami drivers have earned the city the title of worst road rage in a survey released Tuesday.
Miami motorists said they saw other drivers slam on their brakes, run red lights and talk on cell phones, according to AutoVantage, a Connecticut-based automobile membership club offering travel services and roadside assistance.
Other cities near the top of the rude drivers list were New York, Boston, Los Angeles and Washington, D.C.
South Miami resident Erik Pinto told The Associated Press he's probably seen every bad driving habit on Miami's roads.
"You don't want to know what I've seen," Pinto said. "I've seen everything. I'm from L.A., and we don't see the crazy drivers that you see here."
Portland, Ore., drivers were the least likely of the cities to see other motorists tailgating on the roadways, and St. Louis motorists were the least likely to swear at another driver, the survey found.
Minneapolis-St. Paul was rated the most courteous city in 2006 but slipped to the middle of the list this year.
The most frequent cause of road rage cited in the survey was impatient motorists. Drivers also cited poor driving in fast lanes and driving while stressed, frustrated or angry.
"The best piece of advice is to take a deep breath. Slow down, be aware and be careful," AutoVantage spokesman Todd Smith said, adding the aim of the survey is to increase driver safety across the nation.
More than 2,500 drivers who regularly commute in 25 major metropolitan areas were asked to rate road rage and rude driving in telephone surveys between January and March. The survey was conducted by Prince Market Research has a margin of error of plus or minus 2 percentage points.
The list, ranked from those reporting the most incidents of road rage to the fewest:
1. Miami
2. New York
3. Boston
4. Los Angeles
5. Washington, D.C.
6. Phoenix
7. Chicago
8. Sacramento, Calif.
9. Philadelphia
10. San Francisco
11. Houston
12. Atlanta
13. Detroit
14. Minneapolis-St. Paul
15. Baltimore
16. Tampa, Fla.
17. San Diego
18. Cincinnati
19. Cleveland
20. Denver
21. Dallas-Ft. Worth
22. St. Louis
23. Seattle-Tacoma
24. Pittsburgh
25. Portland, Ore.
For the second straight year, rude Miami drivers have earned the city the title of worst road rage in a survey released Tuesday.
Miami motorists said they saw other drivers slam on their brakes, run red lights and talk on cell phones, according to AutoVantage, a Connecticut-based automobile membership club offering travel services and roadside assistance.
Other cities near the top of the rude drivers list were New York, Boston, Los Angeles and Washington, D.C.
South Miami resident Erik Pinto told The Associated Press he's probably seen every bad driving habit on Miami's roads.
"You don't want to know what I've seen," Pinto said. "I've seen everything. I'm from L.A., and we don't see the crazy drivers that you see here."
Portland, Ore., drivers were the least likely of the cities to see other motorists tailgating on the roadways, and St. Louis motorists were the least likely to swear at another driver, the survey found.
Minneapolis-St. Paul was rated the most courteous city in 2006 but slipped to the middle of the list this year.
The most frequent cause of road rage cited in the survey was impatient motorists. Drivers also cited poor driving in fast lanes and driving while stressed, frustrated or angry.
"The best piece of advice is to take a deep breath. Slow down, be aware and be careful," AutoVantage spokesman Todd Smith said, adding the aim of the survey is to increase driver safety across the nation.
More than 2,500 drivers who regularly commute in 25 major metropolitan areas were asked to rate road rage and rude driving in telephone surveys between January and March. The survey was conducted by Prince Market Research has a margin of error of plus or minus 2 percentage points.
The list, ranked from those reporting the most incidents of road rage to the fewest:
1. Miami
2. New York
3. Boston
4. Los Angeles
5. Washington, D.C.
6. Phoenix
7. Chicago
8. Sacramento, Calif.
9. Philadelphia
10. San Francisco
11. Houston
12. Atlanta
13. Detroit
14. Minneapolis-St. Paul
15. Baltimore
16. Tampa, Fla.
17. San Diego
18. Cincinnati
19. Cleveland
20. Denver
21. Dallas-Ft. Worth
22. St. Louis
23. Seattle-Tacoma
24. Pittsburgh
25. Portland, Ore.
French workers biggest whiners, Irish happiest:Study
French workers are the world's biggest whiners, according to a study published Monday which said the Irish complain least about their lot.
Britons come second to their Gallic cousins in the moaning stakes, followed by Sweden, the United States and Australia. Japanese workers have the lowest morale, but don't complain so much.
The lowest levels of whining were found in the Netherlands, Thailand and Ireland, according to the study by the FDS research group.
"It is interesting to note that after France, Britain and Sweden, the world's biggest workplace whingers are Americans, despite their having by far the highest levels of income," said FDS chief Charlotte Cornish.
"Compare them to Thai workers: while real levels of income are more than eight times higher in the States, more workers in the US feel their pay is a problem than in Thailand," she added.
The study, entitled "What Workers Want, A Worldwide Study of Attitudes to Work and Work-Life Balance", draws on data from 14,000 employees in 23 countries.
They were notably asked about their satisfaction with issues including pay levels and their work-life balance, as well as average working hours.
In terms of worker morale, Dutch workers are the happiest, followed by their Thai and Irish counterparts. The lowest morale of all is found in Japan, followed by Germany, said the study.
The study's authors noted that rightwing French President-elect Nicolas Sarkozy shouldn't expect things to become happier anytime soon, as he prepares to shake up notoriously strike-prone France.
"The UK and US, with their marked competitive individualism and unequal wealth distribution, both appear towards the top of the world's list of whingiest workers," said Cornish.
"The French come out on top -- it seems unlikely that Nicolas Sarkozy's election and the likely shift to more Anglo-Saxon economic practices will make the workers in France any more happy with their lot," she added.
Britons come second to their Gallic cousins in the moaning stakes, followed by Sweden, the United States and Australia. Japanese workers have the lowest morale, but don't complain so much.
The lowest levels of whining were found in the Netherlands, Thailand and Ireland, according to the study by the FDS research group.
"It is interesting to note that after France, Britain and Sweden, the world's biggest workplace whingers are Americans, despite their having by far the highest levels of income," said FDS chief Charlotte Cornish.
"Compare them to Thai workers: while real levels of income are more than eight times higher in the States, more workers in the US feel their pay is a problem than in Thailand," she added.
The study, entitled "What Workers Want, A Worldwide Study of Attitudes to Work and Work-Life Balance", draws on data from 14,000 employees in 23 countries.
They were notably asked about their satisfaction with issues including pay levels and their work-life balance, as well as average working hours.
In terms of worker morale, Dutch workers are the happiest, followed by their Thai and Irish counterparts. The lowest morale of all is found in Japan, followed by Germany, said the study.
The study's authors noted that rightwing French President-elect Nicolas Sarkozy shouldn't expect things to become happier anytime soon, as he prepares to shake up notoriously strike-prone France.
"The UK and US, with their marked competitive individualism and unequal wealth distribution, both appear towards the top of the world's list of whingiest workers," said Cornish.
"The French come out on top -- it seems unlikely that Nicolas Sarkozy's election and the likely shift to more Anglo-Saxon economic practices will make the workers in France any more happy with their lot," she added.
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